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Joke of the Day

"Have you heard about those new corduroy pillows? They are making headlines!"

"I hate it when I accidentally grab two pieces of pizza and then have to eat the whole thing to keep it even."

"You can tell by a woman's feet how she feels about you. If they are behind her ears, she likes you."

"I believe every child should be given a chance... ...and that's why if they can guess the number I'm thinking of, I'll let them go..."

"If I ever win the lottery and someone asks me for money I'm going to give them a dollar and say ""Here. Go play the Lottery. That's what I did."""

"Why do New Zealanders have so many furry conventions? Because they're kiwis."

"Fred: I was going to buy you a handkerchief for your birthday. Betty: That was a kind thought. But why didn't you? Fred: I couldn't find one big enough for your nose."

"Q: What do you call a deer with no eyes? A: No-I-Deer Q: What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? A: Still No-I-Deer"

"Please pray for my friends' 4 yr old. I just found out that ten minutes of his life wasn't photographed or documented on Facebook today."

"If you visit a city, make sure you buy a T-shirt with that cities name on it so people know you went to that city."