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Joke of the Day

"OMG!! I made a science Joke. What did the German small intestine say when you asked him if he would go to the party? -Vill i?"

"Q: What do you call a clairvoyant midget who escaped from prison? A: A small medium at large."

"What do you call a cat sitting on the edge of a cliff? A precipuss."

"I was banging my neighbors wife, doggy style, when her husband came home... She said, ""OH MY GOD, use the BACKDOOR!!"" I should've left at that point, but you don't get an offer like that every day..."

"What do you get when you cross the Godfather with an attorney? An offer you can't understand."

"How do you turn a fruit into a vegetable? A.I.D.S."

"The reason iPad has no camera is that there's no way to take a good pic while laughing at how goofy you'd look using it as a big ass camera."

"9/11 Jokes aren't funny... But the other 2 are."

"My 7-year-old daughter asked me twice today ""what poison would kill someone the fastest?"" and now I'm wondering if I've underestimated her."

"If Bruce Wayne was Jewish, would he have had a bar mitzvah or a bat mitzvah?"