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Joke of the Day

"I don't even like sports but I'm excited for next year's superbowl... Because it will be Superbowl L"

"I missed the lunar eclipse, but I've seen shadows before, so I get how awestruck everyone was."

"I Hate Housework! I hate housework! You make the beds, you do the dishes ...and six months later you have to start all over again."

"Because they need to bring young people to the church, insiders say the front runner for Pope is Seth MacFarlane."

"We don't lose friends, we just learn who our real ones are."

"The hardest part of any relationship is when it's not your turn to talk."

"Having an elliptical in my living room has improved my health. Moving it out of the way when I lay down to watch TV burns like 25 calories"

"Why can't you purchase minerals by the gallon? They only come in quarts(z)"

"If you're a douchebag, it's so easy to find the right hat."

"Messy people must see reality shows differently They must see shows like ""hoarders"" as people with a bunch of cool stuff and douche bags throwing it away"