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Joke of the Day

"A man walks into a bank... and yells ""this is a fuck up!"" confused, the teller says ""you mean a stick up?"" ""Nope, it's a fuck up, I forgot my gun"""

"What has 100 balls and fuck rabbits A shotgun"

"What does a horse and kryptonite have in common? They both paralyze superman"

"I was armed to the teeth. Now most of my teeth are gone. Let's just say I filed an assault case."

"Whats the difference between jam and marmalade??NSFW You can't marmalade your cock up someone's ass"

"I like my porn just how I like my search history Disabled. EDIT: First post and front page. Woohoo!"

"I'm surprised ""slow internet connection"" doesn't come up more often as a motive in murder trials."

"My girlfriend said she needed time and distance... So I slapped her with velocity."

"What's blue, standing in the kitchen? STFU, I can paint my wife any colour I want!"

"$10 Complaint A man goes to a $10 hooker and contracts crabs. When he goes back to complain, the hooker laughs and says, ""What do you expect for $10 -- lobster?"""