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Joke of the Day

"Did you know that pi day is tomorrow? I didn't, because there have been 0 sines"

"My brother's so homophobic that if he dropped his keys in San Francisco he'd kick them to Oakland before bending over to pick them up."

"I've had my phone battery die at a family function. Nothing scares me now."

"Did you see the guy who didn't have a right hand? No, he left"

"I've lost more friends to Candy Crush than Crystal Meth."

"What's the stupidest animal you can find in a jungle? A polar bear."

"She wants to share a Facebook account? Run."

"[NSFW] Why was the Pedophile depressed? Because he couldn't fit in"

"What's a panda's favorite drink? Fanta."

"What's the difference between a priest and a dog? One wears pants and a collar, the other wears a collar and pants"