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Joke of the Day

"whenever i see sombody obsessively taking photos of the sunset, i go up to them & whisper ""dont worry.. the sun is gonna come back tomorow"""

"Why did the tofu cross the road? To prove it wasn't chicken. >:|"

"I ate a tomato slice off the carpet. And some lettuce. And some bleu cheese bits. And mushrooms. I'm saying I dropped my salad on the floor."

"I used to be in a band called Missing Cat' You've probably seen our posters."

"""Mom I wanna go bungee jumping."" ""NO!"" ""But all my friends are going"" ""Oh! So if your friends jump off a cliff, will you too?"" ""Er...yes"""

"If I had a dollar every time a girl hit on me... I would still be poor"

"I saw Bill Cosby at the bar last night... He asked me if I needed any sugar for my Long Island iced tea."

"Where can you find tetraplegics? Where you left them."

"Why is China so politically in bed with Africa? Because China is the biggest coal burner in the world"

"I drove my car into a river and watched it turn into a mobile phone... One minute, a Kia. Next minute, Nokia."