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Joke of the Day

"You want to know a neat trick to get yourself to stop being annoyed by a baby crying? Close the lid to the dumpster."

"The backside of women is my second favorite part. It's right behind the front."

"""Kim Jong Il dies at 69."" That's how I'd like to go. With wet balls and a face full of cunt."

"Yeah, well, I didn't exactly want to be late for work today either but it's not like hot wings can shave themselves out of chest hair."

"Do a little dance... Drink a lot of rum... Fall down tonight..."

"You probably didn't hear about the power outage in New York City... I think the news should have shed more light on it."

"Nicki Minaj knows we can see her, right?"

"My cell phone battery dies quicker than a mother in a Disney movie"

"What is something that can breakdance on the floor only once on their life? A fish"

"Did you know that the walrus has the second largest penis of all mammals? ........................... ........................... I have the first :) Stole it from 50 first dates."