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Joke of the Day
"Why was the calendar depressed? His days were numbered."
Next Joke
"I was so busy yesterday, my smart phone had 75% battery left at the end of the day."
"At what age do you tell a highway it's adopted???"
"[BDSM] I accidentally flogged another dominatrix's client Oops, wrong sub"
"I am a massive massive MASSIVE worrier. I can't stress enough."
"What's the difference between a joke and a pretty girl? sometimes i get the joke."
"Gerald: ""Have you ever come across a man who at the slightest touch caused you to thrill and tremble in every fiber of your being?"" Mabel: ""Yes the dentist."""
"Jumper cables walked into a bar Bartender said I'll serve you but you better not start anything!"
"What do you call a deaf dinosaur? Anything you like - he can't hear you."
"What is a pirate's favorite letter? [read with a pirate accent when they most likely say, ""RRRRR""] ""You'd think it'd be R but 'tis the C they love"""