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Joke of the Day

"Shoplifting may be wrong in a general sense, but what if, for example, I'm bored of paying for things"

"*spelling bee* Me: b-e-e Judge 1: No, sir, wait until we tell- Me: B-E-E Judge 2: I mean, he's not wrong"

"Did you hear the one about Donald Trump and the 7 pissing prostitutes? Because the real joke is CNN's journalistic integrity."

"""Your resume has MPGMA listed under hobbies. What exactly is that?"" Making people guess the meaning of acronyms."

"Do you know ... Do you know what girls say to guys with big dicks....... **I do...**"

"Chuck Norris got bored of life, so he invented Ebola."

"Did you hear about the new tractor movie? I heard it has a good trailer."

"What's the best part of split-pea soup? The cut up peaness."

"How many pollocks does it take to paint a house? 1 to hold the brush and 1000 to turn the house!"

"I'm trying to tell a Pokemon joke to my brother but he just doesn't get it. He's a slowbro."