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Joke of the Day

"Why does the bride always wear white? Because it is good for the dishwasher to match the stove and refrigerator."

"why are black people fast? all the slow ones are in jail"

"And the Best McDonald's Employee of the Month goes to Mad Max: Fury Road."

"if money can't buy happiness explain pizza"

"I asked a blonde friend to check if my blinker was working, her reply was 'Yes, it is. No, it's not. Yes, it is. No, it's not.'"

"How many Comcast customer service agents does it take to change a lightbulb? ... Is the lightbulb plugged in sir?"

"I lost ten pounds! Learn my hot diet secret! (I replaced booze with pot)"

"You know what they say about cliffhangers..."

"One way to find out if you're old is to fall down in front of a group of people. If they laugh, you're young, if they panic, you're old."

"What is green and glides down a mountain? A skiwi"