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Joke of the Day

"If your cup is half full... You probably need a different bra. P.S. I don't know if this counts as a joke, so sorry in advance. Edit: layout"

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"Can I have your picture, So Santa Claus knows exactly what to give me on this CHRISTMAS."
"How do cops get rid of flies? They call in a S.W.A.T. team"
"16 sodium atoms walk into a bar...... followed by batman!.... Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na"
"Jaws is exceptionally funny if you just imagine the shark is trying to be friends with the guys on the boat and they keep running away."
"I'm gonna leave this world just like I came in, dawg! ""Yo, for sure. Kickin and screamin!"" Nah, brah. On a giant spaceship."
"I'm reading a book about sufferers of tourettes syndrome... I want to know what makes them tic."
"Two doctors were discussing the game Proctologist:""Did you see the game last night?"" Neurologist: ""No, did we beat them?"" Proctologist: ""We didn't just beat em, we rectum!"
"NEW BASKETBALL IDEA: oblong basketball that gets thrown down a long field-like court. Maybe we tackle the guy who catches it?"
"North Korea has lowered its missile back down after pointing it up for a few hours. Turns out Viagra and MSG make for bad rocket fuel."