184344

Joke of the Day

"I was trying to get over my fear of public speaking at a nudist colony. I just imagined everyone with their clothes on."

"I get chills down my spine every time I hear the song Stayin' Alive... I don't know, there's something about the Bee Gees that just gives me the heebie jeebies"

"We had a nice, quiet dinner last night... Except for the Celery, of course!"

"Did you hear about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac? He used to lie awake all night wondering if there was a dog."

"Ebola walks into a bar.... ....and all of West Africa"

"I got a call today from a distorted voice saying ""Five grand in cash, or we kill your wife"" Both options were tempting, but I decided to take the money."

"If there's enough room to spell 'bootylicious' on the back of your shorts, it probably isn't."

"Went to a KKK meeting the other day... It was a load of white sheet."

"Why don't they let Italians swim in Long Island Sound? If you know that one, try this one: Why do seagulls fly to the dump?"

"What's the difference between Spartacus and Hannibal Lector One of them's a gladiator, and the other is glad he ate her!"