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Joke of the Day

"What's worse than sucking a dozen raw oysters out of your grandmothers pussy? Sucking out thirteen and realizing you only put in twelve"

"*Witnesses an awkward moment* starts a slow clap* sees that nobody is joining me* pretends like I'm trying to kill mosquitoes*"

"The treasure hunt was invented in northern India. Thus the name 'hide and Sikh'. #truefact"

"If Christian Bale has never cancelled a date and said ""sorry to Bale on you"" then I don't think he is living life to the fullest."

"Rap is 75% Crap..."

"This is ridiculous: ""www"" contains THREE TIMES more syllables than the phrase it is 'short' for, ""world wide web."""

"Jesus Saves.... Moses invests."

"A blind man walks into a bar ""Ow!"" he exclaims. The bartender responds by saying that he doesn't know that drink."

"Did you read that story on r/news? [removed]"

"What's the difference between a psychotic mental patient and a man with a bible in his hand? Respiridol"