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Joke of the Day

"Richard Nixon makes a really awful dinner for his wife. He defends himself by saying ""I am not a cook""."

"Jessica Simpson has already taught her daughter everything she knows."

"ME: Off to the concert with my friends WIFE: Say hi to everyone for me [later] ME [individually saying hi to 10,000 ppl] This is exhausting"

"Pictures of rich missing kids should go on the back of 1%"

"What do FRENCH people order from McDonald's FRENCH fries hahaha"

"I love Summer. Two weeks of doing absolutely f*ck all. And, once my boss gets back, I get to go on holiday as well."

"Fish Cakes A guy walks into a bar with a Salmon under his arm and says, ""Do you sell fish cakes here?"" Bartender: No we don't. Guy: That's a shame... it's his birthday."

"not to brag but i finished this 14 day diet in 3 hours and 38 minutes."

"What do Nihilist's believe in..."

"Why couldn't JFK become a boxer? Because he couldn't take a shot to the head."