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Joke of the Day

"not to brag but i finished this 14 day diet in 3 hours and 38 minutes."

"What do you call a cute shortcoming? Flaww"

"""'There is no 'I' in team!"" *Steve Jobs yells at his iTeam*"

"The French I can speak fluent french, watch this... ""I Surrender"""

"There's an old Irish saying: ""I'm Irish."""

"I went to the store today and bought a movie called ""Tiger Woods' 18 Greatest Holes"" When I got home, I was disappointed, it was about golf"

"A slut's prayer: As I lay down with this creep, I pray he sticks it in real deep, If he comes before I do, I'll have to f*ck his best friend too."

"What's the difference between a girl with herpes and a leather shoe? If you had to, you could eat the leather shoe."

"What do baby pythons play with? Rattle-snakes."

"Today is 4/22! If you missed 4/20, don't worry because today is 4/22"