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Joke of the Day

"I was driving one day and saw a field full of scrawny cows, and thought... ... so THAT's where beef jerky comes from."

"When your telling a joke But you punch up the fuckline"

"How does Jaden Smith keep getting roles in big movies? Where there's a Will, there's a way."

"Why couldn't Moses believe his mother sent him away in a basket? Because he was in de-nile"

"I have been feeling down on my karma lately.. so I bought a horse and named her Karma. Upvotes for me and Karma-horse."

"How many babies does it take to paint a fence? Depends how hard you throw them"

"""I feel your pane""- Guy walking into your window."

"I hate gingerbread. If I owned a bakery, I wouldn't tolerate gingerbread. I'd be like, ""Get outta here, you redhead. Your money isn't good here."""

"I'm really good in bed.....I stay on my side and rarely steal all the covers."

"They say that trains are full of weird people... ...but I don't think that's true. I've never met a weird person on a train, and I talk to *everyone.*"