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Joke of the Day

"My young nephew said that people with glasses should only be able to marry other people with glasses. He's like a tiny Republican senator."

"OMG! I went shopping because I needed a skirt and these earings were on special so I bought four new pairs of shoes!"

"I don't get why people say ""Pussy tastes great""... I've licked 5 of them, Then I got Cat hair in my mouth"

"Prostate Cancer **;** Edit: *But seriously, cancer isn't funny.*"

"I'll never forget my grandad's last words on his deathbed. He said: ""I should never have bought this deathbed. Asking for trouble..."""

"This 5p bag tax is great I can get a 10bag for 50p"

"What's Irish and sits on a porch? Pati 'O' Furniture"

"Humuhumunukunukuapuaa A joke from my 3 yo said just before Halloween. Ahem. What do Humu Humu fish say on Halloween? Trigger treat!"

"Why did all the other toys throw RaggedyAnn out of the toy box? She kept on sitting on Pinocchio's face yelling ""Lie to me, lie to me!"""

"Was standing in my front yard this evening and some neighborhood kids tried to deflate me."