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Joke of the Day

"Why am I ambivalent about a swimming pool? It just deepends."

"American beer is like having sex in a canoe It's fucking close to water (Heard from Monty Python)"

"News reports say that someone stole all the toilets from the police station downtown. The cops have nothing to go on."

"yeah, we r a non-traditional family. instead of naming our dog, we let him name us. I'm Woof, this is my husband Woof, & these r Woof & Woof"

"[NSFW] ""The Pope does anal now!"" ""Holy fucking shit, are you serious?!"""

"Two cannibals are eating a clown One turns to the other and says, ""Does this taste funny to you?"" The other one replies ""Yeah, it kinda does."" Two days later they both died of food poisoning."

"Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay guys house. (awkward silence) knock knock. (who's there?) The chicken. Feel free to try on your friends, its a good laugh."

"How come Django's wife never hears Django coming? The D is silent."

"I Have an EpiPen My friend gave it to me as he was dying. It seemed very important to him that I have it."

"I can totally keep secrets! It's the people I tell them to that can't!"