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Joke of the Day

"You've killed dozens and robbed hundreds of people using your hammer. What can you say in your defense? – Defendant! Stop clowning and sit down!"

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"RIP evaporated water.... ...You will be mist"
"""Disney movies promote false images of the friendliness of woodland creatures,"" I mutter after each rabies shot."
"Why is Reggae so popular in Utah right now? Because it was popular in California 10 years ago."
"What do you say to a one legged hitchhiker? Hop in."
"What do you call Jehova's Witnesses in Chinese Ding Dong"
"What, me? Lazy? Don't get me started."
"The best part of being a crackhead.... Only two more sleeps until Christmas."
"When impersonating a coworker, I like to add a little extra dumb to their voice."
"How do you find Will Smith in a snowstorm? You look for the fresh prints."