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Joke of the Day
"*jumps from the earth to the moon* PARKOUR"
Next Joke
"Damn girl, are you alcohol? Because I've had too much of you and I'm going to throw up."
"I always wanted to be my own boss so now I run a nonprofit Not by choice, im just a shitty salesman."
"That old expression: ""hold the phone!"" doesn't work anymore because everyone is already doing that"
"""Lifehack"" is now just synonymous with ""action."" ""A great lifehack for becoming a doctor is going to medical school!"""
"why do people live in regular houses when there are steakhouses"
"I was working on a new rape joke, but i couldn't get the punchline to flow right. It just came off sounding too forced."
"""ARGHH A HOUSE SPIDER"" [spider removes earbuds] ""yah actually im more into ambient trance but whatever"""
"Sticks and stones may break my bones but words can SUMMON DEMONS"
"Two scientists walk into a bar The first one says ""I'd like a beer"" And the second says, ""I'd like rum"" They didn't wanna get H20. They were in flint."