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Joke of the Day

"Daniel said his mother had one foot in the grave The other one had proved to difficult for workers to scrape off the motorway"

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"Crazy girls are like a street vendor's kebab Hot, jucy, and dangerous."
"Trump is too politically incorrect, Hillary is too politically correct Yet they're both incorrect for politics"
"What would you call Geralt of rivia if he had a sex change? The switcher"
"Friend: Your three kids are so well behaved! Me: Well .... there used to be four."
"Why did Sally fall off the Swing?? Because She had no arms...... Knock Knock Who's There?? Not Sally........"
"""I love u"" ""Umm isn't it a bit too soon to say I love you?"" ""Oh ha I meant the letter U. What's your fav u word? Mine is Unreciprocated lol"""
"Sex is like a cookie It's usually good, but most people like it better raw"
"My nephew asked me what marriage was like. So I gave him a candy bar and told him not to eat it."
"Why did the pirate update his Macbook? His matey told him he needed an iPatch"