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Joke of the Day
"Why aren't pigs invited to black tie events? Haven't you ever seen pig's tie? It's filthy!"
Next Joke
"My wife is a liar! Last night I texted her and asked here where she was, she said with her sister Emma. I was with her sister Emma!!"
"An Irish man walks out of a bar hahaha"
"ME: What tattoo should I get? TATTOO ARTIST: Something meaningful that represents love and connection. ME: One ravioli on my thigh please."
"If we're all God's Children... What's so special about Jesus ?"
"My wife was fixing the caulk around our tub... Me: You should use some caulk softener to make that easier. Wife: Is that like a picture of your mom or something? (actual conversation)"
"""Piece of cake"" should not mean ""Easy!"" It should mean ""Delicious!"""
"Good cop: We know it was you. Just confess. Murderer: I didn't do nothin' Breaks the fourth wall cop: Your name in this tweet is Murderer."
"What is E.T. short for? Hes got wee legs"
"What did the constipated math teacher do? Worked it out with a pencil."