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Joke of the Day

"ME: I propose teaching pandas to play pattycake bec- ZOOKEEPER: How do you keep getting in here? ZOO OFFICIAL: Wait. Let's hear him out."

Next Joke
 
"Happy birthday George Lucas. To celebrate we'll be removing the iconic happy birthday song from your party & replacing it with a worse song."
"What's the same about George Washington, and a tranny? They both chopped down their own cherry trees."
"How would you describe your past work? [Cut to me picking up coins off sidewalks and taking them to CoinStar] -Change management."
"What do politicians and diapers have in common? They both should be changed regularly, for the same reason! *ba dum tssh*"
"I needed a password eight characters long... ... so I picked Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs."
"A man is being arrested by a female police officer, who informs him, ""Anything you say can and will be held against you."" .... The man replies, ""Tits!"""
"Girl Horribly Rejected https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=va9sVhWuAv8&feature=youtu.be"
"Sixteen sodium atoms walk into a bar followed by Batman."
"BUZZ ALDRIN: I spy, with my little eye, something beginning with E. NEIL ARMSTRONG: Earth? BUZZ: Nope *5 minutes silence* BUZZ: OK, yep."
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