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Joke of the Day

"TIL Pat Mccrory doesn't have a gender specified on his birth certificate It's Pat! edit: changed joke entirely"

"How does a West Virginia mother know when her daughter is on her period? Her son's dick tastes funny"

"FIRST TIME SEX My 1st time having sex. I suddenly stopped and didn't move. She: ""What are you doing?"" Me: ""I've seen this on YouPorn, it's called Buffering."

"A blond goes to the doctor Blonde: Doctor my skin is very smooth and fair, what should I do before going to sleep? Doctor: Lock the door"

"spit your drink at the person sitting across from you and tell them it's because you were laughing at this."

"My GF was brutal when we moved. Told me anything not used in the past 6 months had to go... I just looked down and gave my condolences"

"You're never too old to disappoint your parents."

"I just saw a hot mom at McDonalds spank her kid after he threw his fries on the ground ...so I threw my fries on the ground too."

"Best thing I've seen on Facebook all day: ""I thought Ariana Grande was a font."""

"How does Batman's mom call him home for dinner? She doesn't because she's dead."