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Joke of the Day

"Doctor: I have two bad news for you. Doctor: The first one is that you have cancer. Patient: whats the second one then? Doctor: you also have alzheimer's. Patient: well at least I dont have cancer"

"I've been searching months for my girlfriends killer. But nobody will do it."

"This might be a bit rascist: What do you call an African American Houdini? Black Magic"

"Had a discussion with my boss about how lanyards can strangle.... conversation took a turn.... I am either fired or getting a HUGE raise x2"

"I told my boyfriend that I felt like I had been forgetting a lot of things lately. He said, ""because I've been fucking your brains out."" I've never laughed so hard."

"I caught my wife cheating with the neighbor last night They are both banned from being the banker during monopoly game night now. That will teach them to sleep together."

"Relax white people, black people have the ""N"" word. But we still have words like ""Yacht"", and sayings like ""thanks for the warning officer""."

"Jimmy was eating ice cream but dropped it as he crossed the street. Why? He was hit by a bus."

"The last airline I flew charged for everything. Except for the bad service. That was free."

"So Lisa said she wanted to be friends with benefits Where's my dental plan, you slut? (source, college humor)"