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Joke of the Day

"Dentist: How often do you floss? Dracula: Every day Dentist: Your gums are covered in blood. Dracula: Oh...I mean never. I never floss."

"""I have a cure for your burning bush."" """" Moses hitting on the ladies"

"Doctor: You seem to be in excellent health. Your pulse is as regular as clockwork. Patient: That's because you've got your hand on my watch!"

"Why is the ocean salty? Because the land doesn't wave back."

"Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Becoz, its a chicken ... bok bok bawwkkk [insert chicken dance here]"

"Guys are excellent cooks. With two eggs, a sausage and a little bit of milk; they can keep a girl's stomach full for 9 months.."

"Him: Let's play ""show me your binky."" Me: Hey Father, this is a fucked up confession. Can't I just say a Hail Mary?"

"What is a psychic medium? ...smaller than a psychic large."

"What do you call jokes about bread? buns"

"How many homeless people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Zero. Homeless people don't screw in light bulbs; they screw in cardboard boxes."