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Joke of the Day

"When a girl doesn't invite me up to her place after a date I just assume it's because she's a hoarder with 30 kitty cats."

"Why did the hot dog vendor cry? He burned his wiener"

"How does a coat steal something? They jacket"

"All right stop, coagulate and thicken"

"Hey Mark, do you want a threesome? So go home fast. Perhaps you arrive on time."

"*popular kid is struggling in class *gets a tutor to help *Kool-Aid"

"Why is it better to be a redditor rather than a suicide bomber? You are guaranteed to meet more virgins.."

"I hate when I'm cruising in my convertible, hair blowing in the wind, then realize I'm just sitting on my ride-on lawnmower. Drunk. Again."

"I like my women like I like my coffee noice"

"My first time having sex was like my first time riding a bike... My dad was holding me from behind"