199904
Joke of the Day
"How does a coat steal something? They jacket"
Next Joke
"If I ever commit suicide, I wanna jump off a cliff w/an open umbrella so people wonder if I thought it would bring me safely to the ground."
"How do you remember your wife's birthday? forget it once."
"ME: *smashes bottle into a ship* MAN: Oh cool, what are you naming it? ME: I'm not *smashes another bottle* I just hate ships"
"What's worse than two babies in a dumpster? A baby in two dumpsters."
"What did the duck say to the prostitute? Put it on my bill"
"You call it nervousness or having the jitters. I call it, I think my body was possessed by a meth addict in detox. Samesies?"
"Q: What did one flea say to the other flea when they came out of the movies? - A: Should we walk home or take a dog?"
"We only use 10% of our brains because the other 90% is busy regretting saying ""You too!"" to a waiter after he said ""Enjoy your meal."""
"What is the difference between a mechanical and civil engineer? The former builds weapons, the latter targets"