182017

Joke of the Day

"Why did the painter from Boston have trouble making friends? He was way too autistic for his own good."

"Wanna hear a joke about ebola? You won't get it."

"I couldn't sleep last night so I decided to play on my drums. I also learnt that my neighbour has Tourette's."

"Why did 10 die? Because it was in the middle of 9 11"

"What's the difference between a pickpocket and a peeping tom? A pickpocket snatches watches."

"Ex-Girlfriend: I heard you & your new girlfriend are having problems... Well, you've always got my number. Me: Yes, is it still 666?"

"President's Day is just a holiday invented by Presidents to sell more Presidents."

"If I ever start a customer service company, I'm going to name it 'Hold Please'."

"OFFICER DOWN I REPEAT WE HAVE AN OFFICER DOWN. I'm fine just down for whatever. Dancing or something fun."

"How do you lose a Football championship penalty shootout? You Messi-up"