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Joke of the Day

"I've read Plumbing for idiots' twice and I still haven't got a clue what I'm doing. I guess it's going to take another few reads before this sinks in."

Next Joke
 
"I can be a real tiger in bed. No, wait, wait... What's that animal that plays dead?"
"My metaphors are like similes. Rock solid as a mountain."
"Listen, I might be 320 pounds but my doctor says I have the heart of a 20 year old athlete. Thank god he'd signed a donor card."
"Never trust your kids. You know who their parents are."
"Do you know karate? Cause your body's kickin!"
"Obama, The CIA, and Darpa walk into a bar... The End."
"Do you know why Kim Jong Un executes everyone he doesn't like? Because he doesn't have a Seoul."
"What was the root of the problem dark ages? The potato famine."
"I texted my girlfriend ""I love you"" and she texted back ""I love you more. When I went to respond I made a typo and sent ""I love you moist""....I figured why correct it, it's true too."