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Joke of the Day

"Why are there so few Mexican athletes in the Olympics? Because most of them who can run, jump or swim are already in the United States."

"My daughter asked me to help her find a job because she's learned enough in school. She's 5."

"Once you've seen an Elephant attacked by a lion... You've seen a maul."

"What did Arnold Schwarzenegger say when he saw a dolphin caught in a net? ""It's not a too-nah!"""

"What happens if you pass gas in church? You have to sit in your own pew."

"What's red and hangs from the ceiling? A red ceiling hanger! What's blue and hangs from the ceiling? [you reading this] I don't fucking know, a blue ceiling hanger? No asshole, they only come in RED!"

"If I got a dime for every time I didn't know what was going on, I'd be asking people why they're giving me dimes."

"When is a mass shooting not a mass shooting? When it involves energy, because energy had no mass."

"What is Trump going to build to detain illegal Mexican immigrants if he becomes President? Juantanamo bay"

"Why should men not engage in esports while horny? They get erekt."