181485

Joke of the Day

"CANADIAN: im a canadian DATE: cool i've never met a comedian befor CANADIAN: [is too polite to corect them, dedicates entire life to comedy]"

"How to get holy water? Boiling the hell out of it"

"My mom wants a new cooking skillet for Christmas. I haven't got the dough, but oh well, we'll see how things pan out."

"I'm opening a restaurant called ""It doesn't matter, whatever you want"" since every girl alive wants guys to take them there."

"What did the Jew with a boner say when he bumped into a wall? Oowwww...my nose."

"Why do sumo wrestlers shave their balls? So they don't have hairballs!"

"Look, if crying doesn't solve the problem, then maybe I'm just not the person you should be asking."

"A terrorist posts on reddit. His post blows up. He meets 72 virgins. His day could not be better."

"Last night I found out that my wife has conditional gender dysphoria. She said that she needed to be Frank with me."

"What's blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint."