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Joke of the Day

"Brushed the fur off my couch and made another cat."

"99% Indians work on the Principle of Rockets. It doesn't mean we aim for the sky. It means, we don't start work unless our tail is on fire"

"What do you call it when a bison borrows money from you? A buffa*loan.*"

"How many Apple workers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to over hype the new lightbulb and one to make sure it breaks within a year."

"What do you call a serial killer that rides a bike? A Cyclepath"

"Cop1: Has becoming a father affected your work Cop2: Not a bit Cop1: Ok cover me, I'm going in Cop2: HI GOING IN I'M DAD [both get shot]"

"Why does a chicken coop have 2 doors? Because if it had 4 doors it would be a chicken Sedan!"

"Guys who are enemies of Putin seem to have the worst luck."

"WIFE: you forgot to run the dishwasher again, didn't you? ME: [drinking milk from a flower vase] no, why?"

"Yes I get laid because I'm an illusionist. But I don't use ""magic"" or ""tricks"" on women. They respect my skills & choose to make love with m"