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Joke of the Day
"""How am I driving?"" No seriously, how did I get here. This isn't my car."
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"Why wouldn't Jeffery Dahmer go down on Terri Schiavo? Because cannibals don't eat vegetables."
"The Scarecrow didn't have the brains, Tin Man didn't have the heart, and the Lion didn't have the courage. So Dorothy remained a virgin."
"What do you call two gay Irishmen? Michael Fitzpatrick and Patrick Fitzmichael"
"Did you hear about the blind dog that never got lost? It really nose it's way around."
"When Zelda watches porn... ...does she use adult Links?"
"What sex position produces the ugliest baby? I don't know, ask your parents."
"Why did the Xbox owner cross the road? To fuck your mom."
"""It behooves you."" -Inventor of the horseshoe, explaining to a dubious horse."
"Q: How many Scorpios does it take to change a lightbulb? A: So who wants to know? Why do *you* want to know? Are you a cop?"