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Joke of the Day

"I just got back from the battered women's shelter... Boy are my arms tired!"

"The name's Bond. Ionic Bond. Taken, not shared."

"Did you know the Dalai Lama has a gambling problem? Yeah, he loves Tibet"

"What's the difference between Sarah Palin's mouth and her pussy? Only 20% of the things that came out of her pussy were retarded. /r/imgoingtohellforthis ?"

"What's a lawyer's favorite type of cake? Torte"

"When my family says things like...why don't you have kids yet? I say ""Because I didn't get drunk & do the football team, Sasha."""

"It makes sense why women hate premature ejaculation so much Our whole lives we're taught that nothing worth having comes easy."

"Number Bullying 1 was making fun of 0 for being fat and how he equates to nothing. This continued for several weeks until 0 had enough. He grabs 1 by his throat and shouts ""Stop boolean me!""."

"Did you hear about the man who was found dead shortly after insulting one Mr. T Crews? He died of dissin' Terry."

"The problem with political jokes is that they always get elected"