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Joke of the Day

"Uber lost over a billion dollars in the last six months so they're asking their drivers to check between the seat cushions."

"CNN is fucked if their viewers ever discover they can access the Internet on their own."

"What does Tupperware and a walrus have in common? They both like a tight seal!"

"What is the difference between a black person and a tire? The tire doesn't sing gospels when you put it in chains."

"What is the most dangerous thing in america ? Ans: Nigger with a library card"

"What do you call a sea mammal with a mission? A porpoise."

"How do you call a lesbian's pussy? The no man's land. (From me, but that's an easy one, so someone must have come up with it before. But as a frenchman, I'm pretty proud of it.)"

"A woman once told me to look at the world through her eyes. So I looked out the kitchen window."

"Texting while driving: Bad. Wrestling a shark while driving: STILL LEGAL! WOOHOOO!!!"

"Father names his son Bentley. His friend asks - are you stupid? Why would you name your son Bentley?! Father - i don't care. At least i have Bentley now."