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Joke of the Day

"Hospitals are so shady nowadays... Even the doctors are drug dealers."

"""I'd hit that."" Clearly what my head thinks about cupboard doors and other hard surfaces when I least expect it."

"Pregnant wife: Are you going to be a good big sister? 3-year-old: Babies are jerks."

"I don't understand how people can do such good impersonations. I can't even be myself around other people."

"Why did Obama serve two terms? Because blacks always get a longer sentence"

"So yet another snake walks into a bar... He asks the bartender, ""Gimme a shot of Jack!"" ""No sir."" ""Well why not?"" The snake said. ""You can't hold your liquor!"""

"Why is diarrhea hereditary? Because it runs in your genes!"

"So there are these two fish in a tank... One of them says to the other, ""I'll drive, you man the guns""."

"How do black people get tans at the beach? They lay down on their backs and put their legs and arms toward the sky."

"Q: What has fifty legs but still can't walk? A: Half a centipede."