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Joke of the Day

"What do you do when a black person gets killed by a cop? Let Mayweather lead all the protests, That way we know it will be peaceful and someone will get a hug every minute."

"""You know what pal, lay your own damn eggs"" - jerk chicken"

"*I look into abyss* *Abyss looks at me* *Abyss blinking message in Morse code* *I go off to learn Morse* *I return* ""Why do we park in a dri"

"What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend? Wipe his ass"

"[Me at job interview] And, how seriously does your company take allegations of witchcraft?"

"How to make a charity 1. find someone in need 2. Create an organization and donate all revenue to said someone 3. ??? 4. nonprofit"

"How to become cool A) Put on sunglasses B)"

"What does a Frog use to fish with? A TAD POLE."

"Those glasses really do make you look more dignified. Respectacles"

"Hey you with the Uggs, Michael Kors bag, iPhone, scarf and super excited voice.. *70 million white women turn around*"