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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a chinese poker face? A mahjong face"
Next Joke
"me: wanna see my cat's shed? friend: lots of cats shed. why would-- [my cat enters wearing a tool belt] cat: show him the gazebo, too"
"I once ate an exclamation mark... it was surprisingly good."
"So I bought an elephant for my friend's room the other day. When I gave it to her, she said, ""Thanks."" And I said, ""Don't mention it!"""
"Stand way over there and let me tell you a funny fairytale. Once upon a time I ate all of your Halloween candy this morning."
"I found my first grey pubic hair today. I can accept getting old, but it was in my Big Mac."
"You know how to spell ""Canada"" right? ""C - Eh - N - Eh - D - Eh"""
"So is Walmart a verb now? As in, ""I'm out of clean underwear, so I'm going to have to Walmart it today."""
"Today, I was thinking about the expression 'revenge is a dish best served cold'. Then I considered 'revenge is sweet'. I've come to the conclusion that revenge is ice cream."
"How does someone pay for a painting? With Monet"