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Joke of the Day

"Christmas is becoming more and more commercialised every year. Pushing up prices in every sector This tweet is brought to you by Tesco"

"Confucius say... Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day."

"How do you cheer up a brand new battery? Remind him that he's full of untapped potential!"

"How does Jesus make his coffee? Hebrews it!"

"What do you call a Dr. that shares your medical history with everyone? a HIPAAcrite"

"Why did the bee get married? Because he found his honey."

"When it comes to music..... Nobody beats The Jackson 5. Except for their dad. That guy beat the shit out of those kids."

"What did the bumble bee striker say? Hive scored!"

"Did you hear about that geeky trigonometry expert? The only angle lacking in his life was secs."

"How do elves spell? With an elfabet."