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Joke of the Day

"There's a German shepherd next door who keeps burying under my fence and shitting in the flower bed His dog is just as bad"

"My Asian friend bought a dog today! Guess how much they got it for? $5.50 per pound."

"A horse walks into a bar... ...and the bartender asks, ""Why the long face?"" And the horse replies, ""I'm finally starting to realize that my alcoholism is tearing my family apart,"""

"Twitter goes over capacity more than Kirstie Alley's home elevator."

"I Saw a Huge Seagull Today It was big enough to be a D Gull. But not quite big enough to be an Eagle"

"You know it's time for a pedicure when you can exfoliate one foot with the other one"

"What does Hillary's emails and a racist post have in common? [removed]"

"How many people work in your office Less than half"

"What do you call a bakery owned by a redhead? A Ginger Bread-House"

"Stop! Hammered time."