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Joke of the Day

"Diagnose Doctor: Well, those results look bad... Patient: How bad are they? Doctor: It depends, how old are you? Patient: I will be 24 soon. Doctor: Pffff, no you won't."

"I'm addicted to glue You just get attached to it"

"Home Alone is my favorite movie about how child neglect and bad parenting is hilarious"

"What do gay horses eat? Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!"

"What do a Professional Fifa Player and a Rapist have in common? They're both going to score, even if you don't want them to."

"I'm Finally Done Smoking My name was legally changed yesterday."

"After countless scientific trials and errors, I have successfully turned back time. It's emit."

"What do you call a good looking tractor? Attractor"

"A Polish person went to have their eyes tested. The eye test chart read: N Y X C S F R U Z. The optom asked, can you read any of those letters?' read it?' the polish person answered, i know him!'"

"I was going to right down a joke about espousal abuse... But my hand was too sore"