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Joke of the Day

"Gun, while only being a letter away from gum, is definitely not something that your teacher wants you to share with the rest of the class."

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"Tomb = Toom Womb = Woom Bomb = Boom"
"""Sir, you cannot fish here!"" ""Don't worry, I'm just teaching my worm to swim."""
"watch only the first and last episodes of How I Met Your Mother. you're welcome"
"I'm picking up some really good vibes from this guy... ...because he's not coming with me tonight. :("
"True love doesn't care about the look or size of your wallet, it's all about what is inside ..... the wallet."
"I asked my wife what she wanted for Christmas. She told me ""Nothing would make her happier than a diamond necklace"" So I bought her nothing."
"i just got my first prostate exam and im never going back to that dentist again"
"After seeing my dog scoot her butt across my rug, I've decided I need to up my break dancing game."
"I go to McDonald's once a month just to replenish the napkin stash in my car"