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Joke of the Day

"Lady at my gym is pedaling a stationary bike while eating chips right out of the bag. I'm hiring her as my personal trainer."

"What did one computer say to the other? Error 404 joke not found."

"POLLY GETS A CRACKER WHEN HE STOPS REFERRING TO HIMSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON, and not a moment before. Stupid bird."

"What is another word for a python ? A mega-bite !"

"What is the best part about a prostitute dying in the middle of your session? The next hour is free."

"[running amok in flames] WHY ARE INFLAMMABLE THINGS FLAMMABLE!?"

"Instead of calling it them locker combinations.... We should call the locker permutations."

"What's the Turkish version of court packing? Turkey stuffing"

"When a big account that doesn't follow me stars me suddenly, I crouch down and stay still, hoping it will tiptoe up and eat from my hand."

"Where do snowmen keep their money ? In a snowbank !"