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Joke of the Day
"Leonardo DiCaprisun"
Next Joke
"Doctors Jokes "" Doctor I keep stealing things"" "" Take these tablets; if that doesn't work get me a flat screen TV."""
"""Oh my god,"" said my wife, smiling, ""our boy's...kicking."" I said, ""Yes, that's generally how football works."""
"Ouija board......""your going to die!"" Me: you're*"
"[identifying body] Cop: this him? Me: yea Cop: he's burnt pretty bad huh Me: yea Cop: ... Me: ... Cop: prolly get a discount on cremation"
"Your Honor, these 52 selfies on my clients phone at the precise moment of the crime prove that my client can only be guilty of narcissism."
"Why can nobody understand sausages when they talk??? Because they speak in tongs. I'll show myself the door"
"What do you get when you play a country song backwards? Your wife back, your dog back, your house back..."
"Why is there so little Puerto Rican literature? Because the spray paint can wasn't invented until 1949."
"I spent this past weekend baby-proofing my house... I'm not having a baby, but I hung up a bunch of anime posters to make sure that I never do."