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Joke of the Day
"When Gordon Ramsay saw a cute puppy gif on Reddit, why did he get mad? Because it was /r/aww"
Next Joke
"What's the best part about being an alcoholic stand-up comedian? If you're good you get laughs, and if you're bad you get booze."
"""Why are you so excited?"" the surgeon asked the patient that was about to be anesthetized. ""But doc this is my first operation."" ""Really? It's mine too and I am not excited at all."""
"I wonder how long it takes a giraffe to throw up?"
"The steak pun... ...a rare medium, sometimes well done."
"I swear I won't be undressing you with my eyes again. That REALLY hurt!"
"So a guy walks INTO a bar So a guy walks into a bar and says "" ow."""
"My doctor told me to watch my drinking. So I'm off to find a bar with a mirror."
"What does a cat say when you tread on its tail? ME-OW! I am very sorry. Just thought of it and felt like everyone should hear it. Maybe some jokes are better left untold..."
"Your heart cannot be an American Hero Because I am going to capture it"