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Joke of the Day

"I just found out my father's sister doesn't like Jewish people. Its hard to believe I have a relative who is auntie semitic."

"Plagiarism is bad? Change a few words, that shit is yours. It's like when you change a baby's clothes- new baby. New baby that's yours now."

"I was going to quit all my bad habits for the new year, but then I remembered that nobody likes a quitter."

"How do you make five pounds of fat look good? Put a nipple on it!"

"A man walks into a ........ Pulls out a ......... And ........... Piss off Fill in the blanks."

"Chicken Joke Why did the chicken cross the road? -To get to your house. Knock knock -Who's there? The chicken."

"What does a jewish pedophile say to a kid Hey kid, wanna buy some candy?"

"What does the Dodge driver say when someone knocks the door? Cummins."

"If I gave everyone on the planet a penny... ...would that be considered common cents?"

"What is the worst thing you can do to a blind man? Leave the plunger in the toilet."