177516

Joke of the Day

"It's almost Valentine's day It's almost Valentine's Day and I don't even have a date, even the milk carton has a date."

"I was on a ride at a funfair. One minute I was laughing my head off. Next I felt angry. Then I just became very sad. Turns out I was on an emotional roller coaster."

"Even in the Olympics, women's basketball is un-watchable."

"Do you know what the difference is between a straight man mustache and a gay man mustache? The smell"

"I used to be a plumber on the International Space Station Shit was outta this world."

"Who takes the most drugs? The police."

"I wonder what Twitter employees do at work to waste time"

"I have a short joke for the ladies, on Thanksgiving My penis"

"I accidentally muted the command switch on my driverless car... ...well, it goes without saying."

"Autocorrect changed ""baby rattle"" to ""baby battle"" and now I'm googling where to buy tiny weapons."