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Joke of the Day

"It's going to take 14 years to put Harriet on the $20? I've got a friend in Chesterfield Square who can print some off in an hour.."

Next Joke
 
"[At make-up counter] But does this lipstick come off of a taint?"
"What's the difference between a bull and a band?"
"I finally realised why Oscar Pistorius lost his trial Because from a legal point he didn't have a leg to stand on."
"My wife is a beautiful, kind & giving woman who also checks my TL."
"What is Harry Potter's favorite way to get down a hill? Walking. J.k, rolling."
"I bet you vegetarians don't even feel guilty eating baby carrots. Barbarians."
"All new Hell's Kitchen tonight. Going to get into the spirit by hanging out in the kitchen and scream at my wife while she cooks dinner."
"My iPhone is currently updating so I have to tweet from my computer like some Ethiopian kid."
"What did Matthew McConaughey have to say about the 2016 Oscar-winner's line-up? All white, all white, all white!"