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Joke of the Day

"Broke my good sunglasses... But instead of buying new ones, I'm just gonna put Trump pictures where the lenses used to be. He seems to be far more polarizing than my Costas ever were."

Next Joke
 
"I painted my laptop black so it would run faster... ...but now it doesn't work."
"I tried Tylenol for the first time today. It tasted a lot like cotton."
"How do blind people sign contracts? On the dotted line."
"I hope the person who knocked repeatedly on the bathroom door knows I took longer on purpose."
"There are two kinds of people. Those who can extrapolate from incomplete information"
"the latest trend I hear the latest trend is to install trampolines on cruise ships - apparently everyone's jumping on board"
"Can you put the pin back in a grenade? It's kind of urgent. Need and answer fast."
"What did the lesbian vampire say to the other? See you next month!"
"This tub of margarine doesn't believe it's me."